You're not like them! You're a good person!
Too many of us women were taught that caring about our looks was superficial...
"Honey, don't worry about your looks. You're so smart and kind, and that's what makes you special. You're not like those silly girls. You're a good person."
Sound familiar? It sure does to me and many amazing women I work with.
These Rats In Your Head
How many times have we heard that beautiful girls are mean or that you can't be both smart and super fit?
These beliefs were instilled in us by parents, teachers, and even friends—adults we trusted without ever questioning their perspectives.
They were often well-meaning guides who genuinely thought they were helping us...
But these stereotypes are not just false; they are damaging.
They planted seeds of doubt in our minds, creating a conflict that has lingered for years.
The Conflict That Holds You Back When It Comes to Weight Loss Over 40
So here we are today...
On one hand, you wish you could lose weight, look amazing, and reach your optimal genetic potential.
You dream of fitting into that size 10 little red dress and feeling confident and beautiful.
But on the other hand, there's a subconscious fear
That losing weight will somehow change who you are fundamentally...
That you'll become vain, and shallow, or that others will perceive you as a bad person...
This internal conflict might be the very block that's stopping you from fully going after your goals.
When it comes to weight loss for women over 40, it often triggers self-sabotaging behaviors, leaving you wondering:
why you can never stick to any action plan for weight loss
and why you always struggle to maintain healthy habits
For example, you might decide to enjoy a piece of delicious chocolate cake, but you end up finishing the whole cake.
Or you plan to have just a few crisps, but before you know it, you've eaten the entire pack.
Is this really because of a lack of willpower?
No!
If it were simply a matter of willpower, you'd genuinely enjoy every single bite.
But most of the time, it doesn’t even make you feel satisfied or happy. It gives you a stomachache and makes you feel sick. It’s not a pleasurable sensation.
So, if it's not because of a lack of willpower, why do you still do it?
It's this deep-seated fear and conflict within you.
You feel like you're sabotaging yourself, and you don’t know why.
This underlying belief might be the reason.
Rediscovering Your True Self
I want to share a powerful video that has deeply resonated with me and many others on social media.
This video features a stylist who specializes in transformational haircuts.
The women who come to him often look sad and ashamed; many of them can't even bring themselves to look in the mirror, feeling like they are a lost cause.
But then, after the stylist works his magic, something magical happens.
Watch the video below to see these incredible transformations.
Video credit: Anthony Claxton
From self-pity to pride
When these women see themselves in the mirror with their new hair and a touch of makeup, their expressions shift from helplessness to excitement and joy.
Their posture improves, and they radiate a new light.
In just a few minutes, they transform from avoiding their reflection to genuinely loving it.
It's like they are 20 years younger, smiling at themselves and feeling beautiful.
They go from feeling like a lost cause to feeling like a star.
You can see it in their eyes! They start by thinking, "I'm so ugly" but by the end of the video, they are thinking, "OMG, I remember WHO I am!"
How does the video make you feel?
The overwhelming response this video received on social media makes it clear:
We need to reject the idea that caring about our appearance is superficial. It's not. Caring for your looks and your appearance is essential.
It's not about vanity; it's about reclaiming your confidence and recognizing your worth.
When you feel good about how you look, it positively impacts every aspect of your life.
Think about the last time you felt truly confident in your appearance.
How did it affect your mood?
Your interactions?
Your overall well-being?
Your relationships?
The connection between how we feel about our appearance and our self-esteem is undeniable.
Acknowledging Your Desire
Are you a monk living in the mountains?
Most of us aren't.
Most of us live in a world where our appearance and how we feel about it impacts our daily lives.
Ignoring the importance of feeling good about our appearance dismisses a fundamental human desire for self-esteem and recognition.
Taking care of yourself is not vanity.
It's taking pride in who You are, and reclaiming what's yours.
It's remembering You and finding joy in your reflection.
Reclaiming Your Confidence and True Self
Whether it's putting on a little makeup, buying a new dress, or losing some weight if you feel like it, allow yourself to rediscover your beauty, see hope again, see strength again, and feel reborn.
If this resonates with you, right now is the time to reclaim what you forgot.
Not just your dream body, but the very essence of who you are.
The very essence of feeling alive.
You might think that other things are more important, but you can't pour from an empty cup. Prioritize yourself first.
When you feel good about yourself, everything else will fall into place.
Reprogramming Your Mindset
It's time to wipe out these outdated programs that have been running in your head for far too long.
Imagine if, instead of being told you had to choose, you had been encouraged to embrace all aspects of yourself.
Imagine if you were taught that beauty and brains, kindness and confidence, can coexist harmoniously.
Imagine if you were taught you could be both successful in your career and feel fabulous in your skin...
The truth is, you can be it all.
You are not confined to a single role or identity.
You can be multifaceted and extraordinary in every aspect of your life.
You can be the nurturing mother, the successful professional, the loving partner, and the radiant woman who feels great about her appearance.
You are allowed to embrace your whole potential, your whole self and live authentically.
And when you embrace this truth, you'll find that everything else in your life begins to fall into place.
Your First Baby Step
Join me for my FREE 90-minute online SuperClass for women over 40!
I'll teach you my No-Diet Weight Loss Secrets and how to shed those extra pounds by breaking free from the diet mindset..
It's on September 7th!
Don't overthink it and register now!
Remember:
Being 40 and diet-free is NOT giving up, it's taking control.
It’s stopping the search for external solutions, turning inward to find lasting health, and deciding to live your best life.
Thank you for joining me on this journey with Fabulously 40 & Diet-Free.
If this message resonates with you, please share it with your network.
Let’s help other women embrace their fabulous 40s, diet-free.
Stay #40andfabulous!
With love,
Nayo
🤗
I Choose to be the whole of ME